The Chalkboard will undoubtedly be in the minority on this one, and yes, it would be slightly different if my own kids were involved. But reading about the Staten Island school bus driver who is all over the NYC news today, it struck my that the guy was rather entrepreneurial, if not outright creative.

Some highlights from the NY Post story:

Michael Cianci, 38, of Parlin, N.J., named his ride the "Death Cheese Bus" and
assigned ranks to his sixth-grade charges, forcing them every day to recite a
set of rules posted by his cup-holder, according to the criminal complaint...

The 12-tiered ranking system ran from "Lord (apprentice of the Emperor)"
to "Sped," a derogatory term for someone in special-education classes. Other
ranks included the Star Wars-themed titles "Darth," "Sith Warrior" and "Jaba."

"As hereby proclaimed by Emperor Mike of the Death Cheese Bus, unit
five, sector seven of the gamma system, these laws are laid down upon us to hold
order and restore power," the bizarro list of rules stated. "The penalty for
breaking this code is banishment. And for a ranking of master or above, the
penalty is death or severe beating."

The list specified that the emperor
was the supreme leader, accountable to no one, that all lords must obey "Lord
Matt," the Darths must obey all lords, and the masters follow the commandments
of the Darths.

The wacko treatise closed with the ominous proclamation:
"Mercy will not be tolerated."

Since so many school buses across the land are completely out of control, my thought was that as bizarre as the situation sounded, at least some one seemed to appreciate order! Again, I know I will be in the distinct minority on this, but it seems like everyone is overreacting. I even say that as someone who once had to push a penny along the floor runners of my bus with my nose while older kids took free shots at me along the way - and wouldn't wish that upon anyone. As I recall, our old Irish bus driver was too drunk to impose any sort of penalties so it was Lord of The Flies kind of stuff that ruled the day.

Oh wait, I forgot the best part of the story... the quote from the proud bus driver's mother:

"My son is just a big, law-abiding, working slob," she told the Post.

Read the Daily News version here. Note to my old friends at the News: Shouldn't the fact that he lives with his mother be mentioned higher? I'm starting to notice a trend...

AFTERTHOUGHT: It's really a shame that this bus driving Jedi warrior was attired as he was upon his arrest. Anyone care to take a guess as to which name was on the back of his NY Yankees shirt? David Wells? The always-menacing Don Zimmer?

Please send all complaint letters about this post to TheChalkboard@nycsa.org.